Shadowed Doom

[Shadowed Doom]

Name: Shadowed Doom

Gender: Male

Age: Adult

Species: Unicorn

Pelt Color: Brown-tan

Mane/Tail Color & Style: Brown, Tail was brown and long, but now is replaced with metal after a bad pyrohydra incident

Eye Color: Brown

Cutie Mark: An I with a skull and 3 horizontal lines.

Residence: A temporary home in Canterlot, but mainly wanders.

Occupation: Inquisitor of Her Royal Empire

Talents, Skills: Very skilled lie detection, commanding presence, scrappy in fights

Likes: Expunging foes of the crown, keeping Equestria safe from its "corrupt" citizens

Dislikes: Perceived enemies of the throne,

Character Personality: Cold, calculating, and aloof, he is very trusting of his own judgement alone. Possibly a bit delusional towards his cause.

[Stygg Whitefeather]

Welcome to the board, Shadowed Doom.

Ok, there's some issues with the application that need to be addressed.

1.) The tail doesn't seem to be in-line with the technical abilities of ponies, as well as, it would make more sense that magic would have just been used to repair the damage instead of it being replaced with some prosthesis.

2.) His occupation doesn't exist in Celestial Divide. There is no "Royal Empire' nor inquisitor. Ponies, though commanding a strong military, are rather civil and diplomatic. Also, there's no empire-expansion occurring from the ponies.

3.) "Expunging foes and corrupt citizens", this goes back to my previous issue. There's nothing like this occurring in our universe with the exception of the Griffon Kingdom, but that is on a smaller scale by targeting former allies of the usurper who committed regicide. Even if it were occurring in Equestria, this sounds to me a bit more brutal than what they would actually do.

4.) I dunno anything about him, or how he would have gotten to such a position. If you're going to create a character that operates in some capacity like this then I'm definitely going to need a paragraph biography. Is he military? Some zealot cult official? How did he come to be where he's at at why.

Also, your profile picture. I know that's Inquisitor Soufflé from FoE - Memories. If you're not The Bobulator (and I can tell from your style, you are not), and who commissioned it, you cannot use it without his permission.

You're going to need to rework this character, perhaps not from the ground up, but definitely from its foundation. He just cannot fit into our universe in this state.