I Ain't Afraid of No Forest {Closed}

[Mortar Retort]

Inside the Everfree forest, on a night of the blue moon, softly treads a blue unicorn humming a merry little tune to himself. Saddle-bags at his flanks, a fez on his head, he trots without recourse through the outer banks of the dark and ominous forest that so many ponies fear – for him, it was a immense cornucopia of raw ingredients of every sort imagined by pony-kind. Mosses, leaves, flowers, insects and monsters. Everything here had a property and purpose that could be extracted, broken down and distilled, then enhanced for fun and profit. On this evening in particular, Retort was after some poison-joke as well as nettles and a few bitter herbs to replenish his diminished stock after the last accidental fire consumed a large portion of his supply.

One saddle bag contained a number of small potions, mostly to scare away larger predators and make a hasty retreat if the need arises – nothing combat worthy, but he had never actually run across anything to make him truly fearful of the peculiar forest. Nothing like the stories had ever claimed. Giant monsters, demonic creatures, a village of blankflank zombie ponies, nothing. There was no reason, in his eyes, to bring anything more than the basics. The other saddlebag contained empty bottles, vials and pouches for collection. Already he had filled a few of those with local ingredients.

Walking from the path, Retort makes a bee-line for a some belladonna, a toxic plant whose berries would be perfect a mixture he has been wanting to test. He eagerly trots over to the patch, excited for the find. With his horn brightly glowing, he draws forth a pair of scissors and a little box and snips away at the plants, harvesting the leaves and berries of the toxic flora.

For several minutes he harvests away, then there came a very distinct sound from behind a nearby rock.

Brrreee! Brrrreee!

Retort gasps, skirting back from the patch and dropping his scissors, his eyes wide and fez nearly sliding off as he scoots back. He looked to the rock with shock and horror as a little yellow ball with huge eyes and four insectiod wings flutter up and onto the rock – trying it’s hardest to look adorably cute. They stare at each other for a long moment, both silent and still, then Retort’s horn glowed again, wrapping and freezing the parasprite in place – it struggled adorably in vain.

“You’re absolutely horrifying.” He commented as he turned his head to his saddle bag, pulling out a corked bottle with his teeth, popping the cork and letting the bottle fall gingerly to the ground. “Perfect! Into the bottle you go!” He floats the parasprite over with his telekinesis, pulling against its insistent struggle to flee like trying to reel in a fish. Once it is near his face, he pauses to look at his catch. He smiles, warmed by the softness of its begging, gentle eyes. “Awww, you’re making this very difficult Mr. Parasprite, why do you have to be so… you!” The parasprite then begun to look ill, it’s face furled, winced, the spat out blob of something at Retorts face – Retort didn’t react. The goop shuddered, then formed into another parasprite, brown in color and much the same as the first. “Aha! My profits have been doubled!” Retort smiled with pleasant delight as he wrapped the new insect into a blanket of telekinetic power then quickly stuffed both the bugs into the neck of the bottle with two loud pops. They fluttered around the inside reservoir, struggling to get out but their fate was sealed when Retort slammed the cork down into the neck and placed the bottle back in his saddle bag. He trotted on ward, looking for more delectable reagents. Tonight, he mused, was going to be a good night.

[mutemover]

The golden-yellow mare lay on a cloud, the soft moonlight putting a silvery sheen on all that it touched. Looking down at the trees below, she sighed inwardly, her mind a foggy jumble of anguish and exhaustion. Without thinking too much about it, she rolled lazily off of the cloud, falling towards the trees below.

At the last possible second, she spread her wings, leveling out above the Everfree. Mute continued to glide, letting the rushing air blow away her frustration. Then, below in the woods, the mare caught a glimpse of light.

Considering briefly the danger that such a thing might pose, Mute hesitated to investigate, pulling up and hovering above the location. The light shone once more, a little ways off. Even though she knew that curiosity killed the cat, there was no stopping Mute from figuring this out. She fluttered down as quietly as she could (not that she could really tell how much sound she was making), trying to get a good look at whatever it was.

Inside the woods was a dark blue pony (wearing a fez, of all things!) putting some kind of bottle into his saddlebags. The pegasus mare hovered along silently behind him, curiously observing this strange pony. She decided to settle on a nearby branch, but when Mute alighted on the wood, the limb proved too weak to support her, and it fell with a crack to the forest floor. The yellow mare winced, knowing that the sound must have been pretty loud; uncertain as to the pony's motives, she remained up in the branches, looking down on the pony through the new gap in the foliage.

[Mortar Retort]

Retort was just wrapping up his venture from the path – not that it was a far venture from it, he was still within eye sight of the road leading to Ponyville. He was just reorganizing his collections when there suddenly a most peculiar and startling sound. From up in the trees there erupted a sudden crash behind him. He turned quickly, his fez nearly flying off his head, to see what made the branch crash. There, in the darkness, he saw nothing. Warily, he stepped back a few steps, then firmly planted his hooves in the soil.

“Hello?” He called, uncertainty in his voice. “Anypony out there?” Least he hoped it was a pony – could it be, he thought, one of the fabled creatures that roamed these parts. It certainly hadn’t leapt out from the shadows and devoured his face yet, perhaps it was nothing. He scanned the tree line, but he could see nothing in the dark but flickering shadows in the moonlight. He quickly had enough of that, then with an ounce of strain, he illuminated his horn, shedding light in a gentle beam to wherever his horn pointed. Then, there, just a little above him, he spotted something lurking – something golden-yellow. He held a gasp, then parted the leaves and branches with his magic to unveil a-

“A tree pony? Heh.” He exclaimed in disbelief. “Wait… is there such thing as tree ponies?” Pondering in thought, “By Celestia, I’ve discovered a new race of pony! What luck! Ohhh, the Royal Science Society will have to take me seriously now! I believe I shall call them Arboricus Pullanus...cus.” He was quite pleased with himself at his believed discovery, and sadly, much like the pony in the tree after he pulled away the branches under her, his dreams of creditability quickly crashed to the ground. A Pegasus, nothing more.

“Aww…” He sighed, “That’s not unknown at all.” Clearly disappointed, he helped the mare to hooves with a hoof of his own. “Alright, upsy-daisy.” He curiously looked her over, ”Now, what in Equestria are you doing out here, this time of night, don’t you know that this is supposed to be a somewhat dangerous place? Come let’s get you out of here.” He closed his saddlebag and turned partially away, giving the Pegasus a questioning look. ”The fall didn’t knock you dumb did it? What’s your name, little pony?” He waved his hoof at her, trying to get a response aside from curious and perhaps sheepish looks. He hadn’t a clue this particular pony was both deaf and mute, and likely looked just slightly crazy in her eyes with his insistent hoof flailing and lip-flapping.

[mutemover]

Mute watched the pony light up his horn, but decided not to move away, lest he think her some kind of monster and attack. When she saw his eyes settle on her, he started saying something about "tree ponies"; she felt her blood begin to heat up at being just another 'discovery' to this pony. While she was distracted with her thoughts and watching his lips, she suddenly felt the branch beneath her give way; as a reflex, she thrust out her wings to catch her, but they became entangled in the leaves and branches, sending her crashing to the ground with a painful and (to others) audible thump.

Grumbling mentally, she accepted the stallion's offered hoof. She was sorely tempted to ask him why he was out here, if it was so dangerous. However, she agreed that it was high time to get back to civilization. Then he mentioned dumb.

She was pissed; a nice idea for a little jab popped into her mind. Skillfully feigning tears and a hurt expression, she pulled out her notepad and scribbled hastily on it "I AM deaf, and I can't speak." She made sure at least three teardrops fell onto the paper before tearing off the page and passing the paper to this stranger.

After turning and trotting along a few steps towards the path and towards civilization, Mute started to feel bad about messing with him so much; even though he'd pissed her off a good deal, she didn't want to take it too far... again. So, on a new sheet, she began writing "I'm sorry for blubbering like this. My name's Mute Mover, but you can call me Mute." As an afterthought, she couldn't resist tossing in a little more harassment at his expense. "I hope it's not too much trouble, but if you want to talk to me, could you write down your words on the page here? You know, me being deaf and all..."

[Mortar Retort]

Retort was taken back, he had only assumed she was knocked a bit wonky from the fall and her mind was still reeling, not that she was indeed deaf and mute. Well, that changed everything, mostly. They still needed to leave – now. The noise could attract something unwanted and although the forest was quiet, anything could theoretically be lurking. He was relieved that she provided a means of communicating – though he wondered if she could read lips. He made sure however that they walked and ‘talked’, getting themselves back on the path and towards town.

”Oh, so… terribly sorry! Yes, right, the paper.” he floated the notepad and quill over to write. ”Sorry about the tree, thought you were something else. Got a little excited. Name is Mortar Retort, but call me Retort. You hurt? We should get going, the noise might attract some unwanted attention. We’re not far from Ponyville.” He handed the notepad back to her so she may read it.

Now, on the path, they made their way out of the forest. Retort making sure Mute was keeping close, himself withing reading distance of her note-pad.

[mutemover]

"It's okay, I guess." wrote Mute. Even though she didn't quite feel so forgiving at the moment, he hadn't done anything truly worth begrudging. "Besides, I've only got a few scratches."

Mute trotted along beside Retort, checking around her often to make sure nothing was following. On an impulse she began writing again;

"So, this isn't the safest place around. What were you doing out here all by yourself?"

After she had shown it to the stallion, she started regretting it; he might remember to ask again why she was in the forest, and that was not a question Mute was interested in answering.

[Mortar Retort]

Retort, accompanying her, was mostly unphased by the intensely creepy place. Yes, certain sounds and the flickering of shadows would illicit his attention, he didn’t appear at all worried. He took a gander at the notepad she offered him, reading it to himself in a low murmur, then immediately his eyes lit up, as if she just had asked him about his favorite thing and in a way, she had.

”Collecting! Oh, right…” He took up the quill and paper in his magic and begun to write. ”Collecting! I’m an alchemist, I was gathering raw ingredients for my shop. Running a little short after an accident. Everfree is one of the best places for many materials. It’s a whole cornucopia of amazing specimens. Also, I have something for you once we get out of here. Should fix those bruises and scrapes lickity split. How about you? Looking for something in the trees?” He float the pad back over to her to read.

Forest was becoming less dense now, the path becoming less overgrown. They were nearing the exit. Just mere meters ahead of them, the open expanses of the fields around Ponyville were coming into view with the town off in the distance, silhouetted against the moonlit sky. Beyond there, Canterlot on the mountains in the distance.

[mutemover]

(I HATE THIS SO MUCH!!! IE ATE MY REPLY!! )

Mute felt a little uneasy at the prospect of receiving a "special something" from an alchemist, especially considering that there had been an accident... Well, maybe it won't be that bad, thought the pegasus to herself as the pair trotted out of the forest.

Mute winced as she read the dreaded question. She started thinking up a good cover when the idea occured to her; perhaps, this once, she didn't need a cover. Maybe she could tell this pony about her troubles.

Mute looked at the stallion, sizing him up; he seemed an honest-enough pony, if a little- okay, very-strange. Making up her mind, the mare decided to wait a little while and see if he was trustworthy before she did anything rash. Taking the pad, she began to write;

"I know this will sound silly, but I was practicing my miming. That's what I do for a living, and I'll sometimes get ponies who try to get me to laugh when I'm doing a serious face. I'll often come out here and practice my poker face with hydras and cockatrices (did I spell that right?), just to make sure I'm up to par." Mute smiled as she handed the paper over to Retort, having drawn a silly face in the margin next to the part about hydras and cockatrices.

[Mortar Retort]

Ah, finally, the fresh crisp air of pony territory, where things made sense – more or less. And nothing moved without intent or purpose. Thus far, aside from a tree pony and a couple of parasprites, the night had gone well. Retort took it all in, giving one last glance back at the ominously dark forest, and planning a return trip in the near future. Perhaps venture deeper into the abyss. He then looked back to Mover, and little idea starting to form in his head. This was, after all, the first deaf and mute pony he had ever come across. Least known about, maybe all those times ponies had ignored his incessant rambling about theory and formulas, they were in fact mute and deaf. Would explain so much.

He took the notepad back in his magic grasp and read, his jaw nearly hitting the floor. He had known some crazy ponies, even himself was perhaps a bit brash in his pursuit of reagents but miming? In the Everfree Forest and at night!? This pony was crazy! Shocked and completely dumbstruck he gawked at her, then at the paper, then back to her, and after that he hastily wrote.

”You mime cockatrices?” He quickly showed her his flabbergasted question, then returned to writing more. ”Did you happen to rip any of their eyes out!? I desperately need…” Then it dawned on him, she was pulling his hoof. He scratched out the last line. ”Ok, you got me you funny pony! Well, whatever amount of truth there is in that, long as you are alright. Here. It’ll take care of any bruises and sores. Also make you really, really hyper for an hour.” He floated the note over to her.

Retort looked back into his saddlebags, rummaging for something in the side with many clanking bottles. He then draws out a small vial in his teeth. Wrapping it unicorn magic he gives it to Mute, popping the cork for her in the process. It smelled fairly apply, but with an almost spearmint infusion. Unlike many of his other potions, restorative ones actually were quite palatable and non-explosive.

He took back the notepad for another moment, scribbling away. ”I’d like you to come by my shop sometime in Canterlot. The Mane Ingredient. It’s near Pony-Joe’s donut shop. If you wouldn’t mind, I’ve been working on some potions to enhance and aid pony-senses like sight and hearing. Would like to see if they can help a deaf pony, like yourself. Interested?”

[mutemover]

Mute couldn't help but giggle at the joke she'd caught Retort with. She fluttered about, doing a cartwheel or two, just to let off some of the silliness. She landed on his other side, taking the potion vial carefully in her mouth and the pad in her hooves as she hovered next to him. Deciding that being hyper would be worth it to be rid of the aches that would follow the bruises, she downed the potion, gently placing it back into Retort's saddlebags as she hovered up higher.

The yellow mare read the next part, about visiting his shop; her heart skipped a beat. Sensory potions? HEARING? Mute felt her thoughts bubbling with anticipation at the idea of finally hearing something. With a shaky hoof (both from the excitement and the potion beginning to kick in) she wrote "Are you kidding me? I'd LOVE to try that out! I'll stop by as soon as I can. Neigh, you know what? I could just go back there with you, if you'd like. I only have a little bit of luggage I need to grab from my room."

Oh, and uh, also... I can read lips, just so you know. I was having a bit of fun with you, making you use the pad. No harm done, right?" From above the stallion, Mute dropped down a few hoof-lengths and rested the pad on his head gently.

[Mortar Retort]

The notepad nearly knocked off his fez as Mute set it upon his head, he quickly caught both with his horn magic. Setting the fez back on his head and the notepad before his face, he begun to write once more. Periodically looking up, delighted in her enthusiasm to assist him with this test. She was more for enthralled then Buckworth has been in the past to assist, though, of course, he knew about the little problems that has plagued him in the past. Thankfully, Mute hadn’t the faintest idea and that was alright in Retort’s book. No apprehension, no problems. Long as everything went well that is.

”Excellent! Glad to read it! However, let’s continue with the notepad for the most part, don’t want to have any mix-ups. Anyway, sure, let’s go. I’ll get galloping back to Canterlot, you can catch up with me on the road there after you’re done at home? How does that sound?” He flipped the notepad back up to Mute as he begun quickly trotting along the road away from the Everfree Forest.

He gave the forest one last glance back, thinking to himself how he's not afraid of 'no forest'.

[mutemover]

Mute caught the pad and read it. Her face fell a bit when she read the part about 'home'; she only had a room at the inn, which was in fact a luxury by her standards. Nonetheless, she shook herself out of it and flew off to the inn to grab her things. She turned around to spare a glance at the forest, glad to be out of that creepy place. Why anypony'd want to go in there alone on a regular basis was beyond her.

[Mortar Retort]

((Closed --> Moved to: Canterlot))